My heart is palpitating, my stomach is fluttering, and my hands are shaking. I just took a big leap in my creative life, and now I need a stiff drink.
I also now need to apologize to you. I'm going to leave you hanging and not tell you what this leap was. I should be able to in about three weeks, but for now I'm going to keep mum and not jinx myself. I promise, however, full disclosure when I have an answer.
As I sit here in the full throes of an adrenaline rush, it occurred to me that I seldom step out into the unknown. Yes, I've had attacks of nerves when I've traveled solo to Bangkok and Peru, but even then I had plane tickets and guest house reservations. Given a credit card and passport, there wasn't much trouble I was likely to get into.
But in my day-to-day life, there isn't often opportunity to really push myself, to take chances and see what will happen.
Once in a very great while, I send a piece of my writing off to a publication so that it can be rejected. I need to do this more often. Not that I enjoy rejection, but eventually there will also be acceptance.
I also need to start creating artwork worthy of entering into juried shows and competitions. I'm sure there will be a long list of rejections before I can rejoice over an acceptance, but if I don't try, there will never be acceptance.
Every time I send something out into the world, I have a little case of arrhythmia, just enough to remind my that I'm alive and my adrenal system is in good working order. It's a shot of energy into my life, and that is good. Scary, but good.
What do you do to keep yourself alive? Do you have something that gives you palpitations and reminds you that there's something out there worth taking chances on? Do tell.
